I pushed it opened. I wish I could say I pushed hard and fearlessly. But it was rather hesitantly, that I cracked the door opened. With eyes closed, ready to have it slammed in my face. Knowing it would be even harder to reopen if it was to push back against me. Against my will, against my dreams. But pretending that I didn’t care. Or that it wouldn’t affect me. That I, like so many others, would press on. Push forward. Towards achievement… But would I?
The door leads to rejection. Or at least the possibility of rejection. It also leads to a corridor where other doors open up to success. But that all seems obscure from here, on the edge of the very first door. Entering the world of passion, where I never thought I fitted. What is my passion? Why am I here? I’ve often felt like giving up without trying. Justifying this by believing that this road wasn’t for me. That I didn’t need it. That I could just float on.
Yet, here I am. Facing a world of new opportunities. Admitting that something is missing. Meaning? Purpose? Does anyone here know? And what is it exactly that I wish to achieve? Did I have to figure this out before turning the knob on that door? Should I have knocked first? But so many people let themselves in, it seems to be the way. The way to success. So I did it too. I creeped inside this new world and am now bracing myself for what’s to come.